I'm with you ladies. I've been doing my best to keep on top of the world for the past two years, but the internet has bored me to death. I'm not interested in exploring anymore. I come here, End of Empire, and sometimes the other forums. Check up on the sports, and tech news, and then I'm bored. I'm never bored. I haven't chosen on my own to watch movies in over two years, but recently...
For me it's more than the internet. Since we're all bored, I'll tell you the saga of my album. I paid a sound engineer to record me last february. Long story short, we hit it off and became roommates, but he turned out to be very lazy, and never finished mixing the album. Granted, it was going to be a lot of work, but I did pay him a lot of money, and he still had more coming. Regardless, nothing happened, but I was stuck because he used a Macintosh to record, and I didn't have one. I'm not rich, so it took a few months, but I built one, illegally downloaded the software I needed, got the album, and have been learning how to mix since then. Which is not easy, by the way. I also realized I had to redo some vocals, add other instruments, on and on and on it's gone, and here I am almost a year into the project, and I have no idea how to bring it to completion, you know? And the worst part is knowing there are folks who know what they're doing who could finish this off for me in, like, two days. But I slave away at what feels like nothing. Last weekend I bought a drum machine because the drums really aren't good enough, and now I have the added burden of figuring out what I'm doing there. Onwards and Upwards! One step forwards and two more back!
It's more than that too. Nothing is comfortable in my life. My desk chair; my couch; my bed; my computer/work setup; my kitchen, my living room - all of it. It's all wrong, and it keeps me off balance all the time. I can't just settle down to work on my album, I have to rearrange everything and arch my neck or stand in an awkward position. I can't just sit down and play my keyboards, I have to find the right power cord and plug it in, and then get things arranged and get the amp on, and by now I've already half forgotten the reason that drove me over into the synth corner in the first place.
Whatever, I'll stop complaining. I know I'm not the only one who feels stuck in a rut. The "economy" is stuck in a rut, politics is stuck in a rut, the company I work for is stuck in a rut (and they're at least making money, just not as much as they want to be making). It's like everyone is tense everywhere, waiting (wishing?) (hoping?) for something to happen.
I keep trying to remind myself that every step matters. And maybe it does, but this is one of those times when ever single step seems so ridiculously complicated and draining. Glad you guys are still here to commiserate with (please at least warn us good if you're shutting off the internet em!!). I really feel like it's not just us dealing with this, but I'm glad we can all be in it together.